10 March 2010

Getting Ready

Things are about to change.

We wanted Liam to have a sibling, because we couldn't imagine our lives without our own brothers and sisters. For me, at least, my sister--even when we were fighting and she was throwing plates and knives at me--was the only one I could really trust. I wouldn't say it was always an Us vs. Them in our family, but most of the time, she was the only one who's made any sense to me.

And it's still like that. Even more now, when she's not trying to kill me.

So I believe that in the long run it will be great for him to have a little sister. But, you know. Things are going to change. Everything is going to change. It's scary and exciting for me and for Honey, but for him... I mean, he's just getting to the stage where things start making sense. We were driving today, and he was pointing at stuff, saying Sign, Car, Tree... The world is becoming a place he expects to know now. It makes him happy to expect things to be a certain way and then to be proven right. And everything is going to change.

So we drove downtown. We walked around the harbor for a couple of hours. We looked at the ducks, and we chased birds, and we sat on a bench and shared a greasy cup of fries, and he suddenly got up and started spinning because someone was playing the saxophone. It was a beautiful day.

I'm just going to have to learn to let go.

It's all good.


Kelley @ magnetoboldtoo said...

ducks, spinning and fries do a world of good.

Roxiticus Desperate Housewives said...

I remember crying on my way to the hospital to give birth to my second daughter, thinking "London won't be an only child any more, everything is going to change." Almost eight years later, all I can think is "what a waste of tears, who would want to be an only child?" -- my two girls are the best of friends and would be lost without each other.


People in the Sun said...

Kelley, as long as it's not all at the same time.

Roxiticus, thank you. I know what you mean. And still, I hope he adapts to the changes. Well, I guess he's pretty easy-going. I hope his mom and dad adapt.

A Free Man said...

Not to piss in your cheerios, just fair warning. The second one is harder than fuck. Six months in and I'm still struggling with two. But then I'm not very good at change.

Ginny said...

You'll manage. You don't even know how. You might think you know, but you don't know. But you will. Manage, that is.

People in the Sun said...

Freeman, I know I know. But some of it MUST be just romanticizing the past, no? I mean, I'm chasing him around the house, and I'm thinking How did I complain for a second when he was a newborn and all he did was lie there minding his own business? But I remember at the time it didn't feel so easy. And hey, all I can do is my best, right?

Ginny, thanks. There are a lot of issues, not just with him losing our undivided attention, but with her not getting what he had for the first two years of his life. And it's not fair, but it is what it is. And in the long run, he will benefit from having a sister, and she will benefit from being alive to do fun things like eat greasy fries, dance, and talk to ducks.

Dan said...

Congratulations man.

I remember feeling really guilty about depriving Amy of her "sole focus of attention" status, but I'm sure she now wouldn't be without her brother.

Plus a sibling teaches you that sometimes life isn't fair. a valuable lesson.

Jill/Twipply Skwood said...

You really, really are doing a great thing for him. I SHUDDER to think of how my daughter might have come out if I had never have had my son. I'm sure it's fine for some kids, but she would have been a mess. Ok, she IS a mess. But she would have been more of a self centered mess if she hadn't have had to share some of the limelight with her brother over the years. In any case, I don't think it's really all that great for them to spend too very many years believing the world revolves around them. Not every kid is like that of course. But having watched it happen to kids many, many times, it seems like most kids really benefit from the changes a sibling brings.

Your description of your relationship with your sister sounds very much like mine with my brother, except we stopped trying to kill each other when I was maybe 12. But he's the person I know will always understand. He's the one who's been there and helped me when I couldn't talk to anyone else. And it isn't a guarantee to Liam, but it's a chance to have someone who understands and someone who does so for his whole life long. It's a really great gift you're giving him.

On a lighter note: He darn well better appreciate it too! Because the second one IS four times the work and ten times the laundry, after all! :-)

Jill/Twipply Skwood said...

Also, have a mentioned recently that he's gorgeous?

Sebastien said...

Love love love that 1st photo! whenever I'm stuck on something, needing to let go, I like to feed the ducks at the nearby canal. Very therapeutic. I'm glad you are bringing your boy to see the birds. They solve all problems.

People in the Sun said...

Dan, thanks. There's still a couple of weeks 'till What's-Her-Name comes. The doctors moved the date from "Any day now" to "Leave us alone." And you're right that life isn't fair. At least he'll be able to talk about how unfair his parents are with his sister.

Jill, wait! Just twice the laundry! Unless she's one of those babies who throw food at their fathers and mess up their clothes, in which case she can stay where she is! (and thanks. Poor guy doesn't even know he's cute yet.)

Sebastien, thanks. He got a little closer but then I had to hold him. I also tried to make sure there weren't too many people around when he quacked. THERE'S NO F IN THE WORD QUACK, BOY.

SJ said...

Congrats on the new template.

And I had something witty to say but I forgot because I had to attend a 2 hour meeting at work.

People in the Sun said...

SJ, you like it? Cool. Blogger has just made it much easier to change templates, so I might do it now every couple of days.

Jill/Twipply Skwood said...

Nah...I'm pretty sure two babies is at LEAST four times the laundry of one baby. Unfortunately. Good luck though. And just think - by the time they get to be 12 & 14 you can just spend your time nagging *them* to do their laundry, so that THEY get to drown in their own laundry instead of you.

People in the Sun said...

By the time they're 12 they'd better be buying me a new house with the money they made from their album sales.

Ellie said...

He's so little!

People in the Sun said...

He is a cutie. But he's also very tall for his age. Still tiny, though.

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