Spitzer? I Hardly Even Know Her!
I was tagged by StyleSwag with the facts about myself meme. About four months ago. What can you do. This time, it's suitable that I do only embarrassing facts. I call it The Spitzer Meme.
- I'll never put ads on this blog because money is the root of all evil, but I constantly think of ways of making money online. And I can't think of anything. I want to start a blog or a website that will make people come over and click on ads and buy shit they don't need, and I don't know how. A man can't even give away his soul nowadays?
- About fifteen years ago, what song was I rocking out to while sliding a 360 on a highway? "Saturday Night's Alright (For Fighting)." Wait, it gets worse.
- Danced in a cage in Heaven Club in London. I wasn't even paid to do that. I just saw a cage and got in. Who can resist an open cage?
- Fainted during a Sinead O'Connor concert. Told you it would get worse.
- Very, very excited about the return of Beauty and the Geek.
- I don't know much about much, but two things others don't know I do know, which gives me an enormous advantage: I'm good at catching stuff with my mouth. Kind of like a dolphin, but not as smart. I don't smile as much either. I don't trust dolphins. And the second thing I know? The formula for calculating 1+2+3+4+... Here's how you do it: You add 1 to the last number (if it's 100, then we get 101), then multiply it by half of the last number (making the result 101*50=5050). I lost my advantage over you.
- Sometimes I'm really happy.
19 comments:
Legend has it that Gauss came up with the N*(N+1)/2 formula for summing numbers to get through a school punishment. Smart kid eh?
Why did you faint in Sinead's concert?
I've always wanted to be able to catch stuff in my mouth. I look up to you in awe.
"Fainted during a Sinead O'Connor concert."
I am not sure we can be friends anymore...
What do you think the press will be like when they find out about us?
Oops. I've said to much.
SJ, you're saying I never had the advantage over you? Don't tell me you can also catch things with your mouth! I won't be able to take it.
And I blame a sunstroke. We got into the festival (Glastonbury) and we put the tent up, and a couple of us went for a walk, and we were so exhausted that we decided to lie down somewhere. When we woke up it was mid-day and the sun was in our faces and we continued walking and Sinead O'Connor was playing so I thought I might as well, and then I moved to the side because I felt dizzy, and before I knew it was lying on top of another girl who was asleep or maybe also fainted or maybe I knocked her over. Don't really know how I got there. '95 was pretty crazy like that.
Dan, I'm not talking about Herpes--just want to make that clear. And I practiced. One day I wanted to do it so I did. It's funny how I used to do that. One day I decided I wanted to play the harmonica and by the end of the day I was playing "Oh, Suzanna." And the same with juggling. All done in a very amateur way, but still, small claims to fame.
Mr. Fabulous, don't leave me like that! Nothing compares 2U!!!
Shelli, wait, is that part of the embarrassing facts? Are you self-Spitzering?
You're TOO funny!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And baby people is as always WAY TOO CUTE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Can he be friends with my baby Felix?????????????? Ok, so he's really my brother's baby...
And how do you find a four month old meme anyway? I was thinking of catching up on my delinquent memes over spring break, but I can't remember what I got tagged for.
Ohhhh, now you get around to me.
You wait for the reality show "NY's Most Embarrassing Moment" to bring me back into the picture. (You do know I live in NY)
Really funny list, Peeps but you do realize that fainting at the Sinead concert was not the embarrassing part?
And what kind of cool, baby trap chair is that, anyway? I need that in grownup size to keep me at my desk.
So I've wanted that Porn book... can you offer a review?
Also, I love that you danced in a cage. That's hot.
durante vita
As your attorney, I advise you to put some damn ads up. Money may be the root of all evil but it pays for the mortgage and all that porn you obviously love so much.
Jill, Felix is almost as cute as Liam, although there's one photo there where he looks like he wants to beat him up just because he's a month older. I will not allow your nephew to beat up my son. I will chase your brother to the gates of HELL.
I have a tag to-do list written down. I'm very organized. I still have another one, which will probably have to wait another four months.
Styleswag, everything came together. I had the idea of doing this tag with only embarrassing facts, and then the Spitzer pun came to me through divine intervention. I knew it was a sign. I knew it was time.
You're saying just attending a Sinead O'Connor concert would have been embarrassing enough?
The chair is a Bumbo. That's another new word I learned this year.
Durante, I haven't read it. It's a collection of essays. No pictures. No pop-ups. No 3-D glasses.
And about that cage... I was... I can explain...
Pelkyi, you see, if I put ads up here it would get me very little money, and if I sell my soul I'd prefer to, at least, be able to live comfortably for a while before I'm off to the lake of fire. Now, if you have an idea about a different website, I'm in. Body and soul.
lol
This was a fantastic way to get to know you some more!
Fainting, eh? I'm more intrigued with the cage dancing, myself! :-)
I took my boss to The Gates of Hell once. I couldn't help it - we were in Philadelphia for a conference & she put ME in charge of sightseeing. :-0 :-0 :-0
I'm not totally sure it's age appropriate for infants though...actually much of Rodin's stuff was on the gruesome side...
People in the Sun,
I actually have ideas for two different websites. One I thought of with you in mind. The other would just be a collaboration--your technical skills would be very helpful. We should discuss in person. I'll be in touch.
I hope you fainted at the Sinead O'Conner concert because it was so bad, not because she was so good. She annoys me.
Jade, first of all, I'm glad you--and everyone else--doesn't judge me for my obsession with Beauty and the Geek. It's good to be accepted. And the cage dancing, well, sometimes you see yourself sweating in a dirty bathroom mirror and you're sure the rest of the world needs to see you dance with your shirt off in a cage. I've learned many things in the ten years that have passed since then. Mainly, I learned the world is okay without my cage dancing. Not perfect, just okay.
Jill, my baby knows gruesome. He's already seen his father jog.
Pelkyi, sure sure. I'm ready, willing, and able.
Kali, I have a lot of excuses for fainting, and I put some of them in the comments already. But really, I'm basically a fainter. Just thinking about carpet patterns makes me dizzy.
Bobo Bimbo chair - nice product placement. Ever tried it on as a hat? No!????? True comedy my friend, GO DO IT NOW.
I was rockin' out to Saturday Night's Alright (For Fighting) last night - the only song I air guitar to.
I'm relieved to learn that someone else takes as long over memes as I do.
Is that you or Elton John in the duck suit? And how come you didn't faint at *that* concert?
I feel that someone ought to stand up for Sinead O'Connor. Anyone who can tear up a photo of the Pope on live TV has got guts. I'd have been even more impressed if she'd done it in a duck suit.
I don't have ads yet either. I can't decide if this is a principled stand or just that I'm lazy and like to squander money. Mind you, I do have Amazon affiliate links. In the 18 months so far, I've made ten cents...
Spooky, of course I already commented about that on your site, but just in case other people want to see how you inspire me to be all I can be, here it is.
Kisser, wait, does that mean I shouldn't be embarrassed or that you need to write your own Spitzer meme?
Simon, I never saw Elton John. Anyway, I don't think he does those coke-days outfits anymore. Now he looks like a smarmy accountant.
And I'd be impressed if I saw the Pope wearing a duck suit. Although... his costume does look a bit duckish.
And about the ads, I saw this Netflix link saying they give $9 for every subscriber. At first I thought it was cool, but then I realized I'll need every person stumbling on this blog to say, "I've been thinking about doing the Netflix thing for a while. What a fortunate coincidence." So meanwhile I can avoid it and just pretend I'm morally superior. Until I come up with something better.
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