The Devil in My Cereals

When I lived in London, I used to get mad at my roommate for eating my cereal. Oh, I knew better, but I couldn’t help myself. Knowing it was wrong of me to get angry, I would wake up in the morning, after he had already left for work, and I’d notice the box wasn’t placed in the exact same spot I left it the day before. It wasn’t money, or the fear of running out of cereal or anything semi-logical as that. I simply let my ego take control of me. I was mad because I wasn’t asked; was not given the opportunity to sit in my royal chair and be the benevolent roommate that says, “Of course you can take some of my cereal. What’s mine is yours.”

Then one night we went to a club. We were each wondering the club by ourselves for a while when I saw him sitting on the stairs next to an Irish guy. I wasn’t close enough to hear what that man was saying, but he seemed to take the conversation very seriously, lifting his finger and moving it decisively. He was having the most important conversation of his life. Sitting next to him, my roommate was laughing himself to tears. He gestured for me to come closer and said, “I don’t understand a word he’s saying. He’s been talking to me for an hour.”

Some time later, it was just the two of us again. Two friends in an unknown territory. Lewis and Clarke. And I felt ashamed of myself for the way I had felt before. There were real moments in life, like sitting in a club with my best friend, and there were fake moments and emotions, like worrying about cereals. Things started to make sense.

The next morning. . . . Is there even a point in writing what followed? It's unbearably clear and predetermined, isn’t it? Human, all too human. I mean, is there anything better after a long night of partying than eating an overflowing bowl of cereal? I hated him as my ego resurfaced. That bastard finished my cereal. And you know what? It wasn’t the cereal; it was the principal.

Whenever you talk about a principal to justify your feelings you can be sure that in this battle the Devil has won.